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SHARON JANIS

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Chapter Thirty-Four

HOLLYWOOD CHRONICLES 

I LIVED AND WORKED IN HOLLYWOOD AND THE LOS ANGELES AREA for around seven action-packed years.  Even though I didn't go too far out of my way to connect with or create famous people, other than generally wanting to be helpful in whatever ways I could, nevertheless, I met and helped quite a few to achieve greater success along the way.  I'm sure the ability to be a blessing to others was a reflection of the powers of grace I'd accessed and received while living, praying, and serving in the energy of divine benevolence. 

Once, while working as editor of the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers television show, a director flew over from England to have me edit a music video to scenes of the show. I was very happy to have such a fun and creative project to do and very much enjoyed editing to music. The song was pretty good too. It had been produced by a relatively unknown music producer whose first projects had failed, leaving him thinking about leaving the business while living with his parents with, as he says, the equivalent of seven dollars in his pocket. Simon Cowell talked about this time on the Ellen Degeneres show (starting around 2 minutes and 10 seconds into the clip).

 

 

As Simon describes in his autobiography, this was when he made a couple of last ditch efforts, including this "Go Go Power Rangers" song that I edited the music video for. The video showed on Top of the Pops, catapulting the song into the #3 slot for England. Simon had his first huge success along with the good money it brought, and I was fortunate to have been able to play a part in helping this man whose works I've greatly enjoyed in the years since.

 

 

Watch the Music Video Go Go Power Rangers!
Co-directed and edited by Sharon Janis
Produced by Simon Cowell

 

Candid Camera: Learning to do it right

I left a decade of monastic life and arrived in Hollywood with no idea of how to find a job. After finding a list of production companies, I decided to send my meager but nicely designed resume packet to over one hundred of them, including ones I didn't think I'd have a chance of working for.   One of these recipients was Alan Funt, the originator and host of Candid Camera, who was quite old by that time, but was still producing occasional Candid Camera specials.   While sending the package, I remember thinking that there was no way he'd hire me - after all, he probably has had the same editor for the past forty years.   Nevertheless, I decided that it wasn't up to me to limit the possibilities - I would send the packages out as an offering to the winds of destiny and the Will of God.   I'm not saying that this is a very efficient way to create business or career success, however it was my way.

Soon afterward, I was hired to edit decidedly non-spiritual tabloid faire for the show Hard Copy as a free-lance editor.  While editing at Hard Copy, I received a phone call from none other than Alan Funt himself.   He called me personally, which was cool since I'd always liked Candid Camera as a child, and had learned a lot about human nature by watching that show.   Alan was now in his 80's, and spoke with a very thick New York accent as he questioned me about stating on my resume that I'd been editing in New York for many years — which was technically true, since the ashram I lived and worked in was in upstate New York.

Alan asked me, "But have ya cut comedy?"   I put on my best tough New Yorker accent and responded, "Alan, I've edited in New York for years, I've cut everything."   This statement was also technically true, because in the ashram, I'd produced and edited different kinds of videos, including many comedy pieces.   In fact, during one summer, the video department was asked to create a "Candid Seva" video for a special course being held on Seva - the selfless service that all residents offered every day.   Fortunately, I wasn't too involved in the filming, because I'm not sure what kind of karmas were generated from messing around with these beautiful, energized, and often exhausted spiritual seekers.

First, the video crew went to the shoe room during the morning chant.   They pulled everyone's shoes off of the shelves and into a huge pile of several hundred shoes.   Everyone who came out of the chant had to spend precious breakfast time searching for his or her shoes.   But they did so, for the most part, without complaint.

Then they had a garden supervisor yell at someone for no good reason, which she did all the time anyway, so the person just accepted it.

At the time, the ashram consisted of three hotels within less than a mile's radius. A shuttle bus would go from building one to building two, then to building three and back again to building one.   The whole round took about twenty minutes, and again, everyone was on very tightly budgeted time schedule between the practices, the usual service, and the extra demands of this special Seva course. The video crew placed a hidden camera at the front of the bus, and filmed while the driver left building one and headed to building three instead of building two.   Someone on the bus mentioned this, and the driver - a super nice fellow - explained that he had a special meeting with our teacher that afternoon, and had to actually drive into town right then to pick up his suit from the dry cleaner.   Well, this didn't work at all because he was so nice, and because he had invoked our teacher.   Who wouldn't have understood his need to get the suit for that reason?   So everyone on the bus just rode along quietly.

The lesson of all this?   You can't get a rise out of people who are surrendered!   The surrender was especially deep at this time due to the intense nature of the daily Seva course, due to the wonderful bliss of devotion with our teacher in residence, and due to the inherent power that comes from a full schedule of spiritual practices, including meditation, chanting, and service.

We edited the video anyway, and sent it in to our guru, who sent back the response that "You don't know how to do Candid Camera right."

So now, here in Los Angeles just a few years later, I thought it was especially fun that Alan Funt himself was phoning to interview me as a possible editor.   He hired me on the phone and asked me to come to his home, where the editing system was set up.  

When I excitedly told the people I was working with at Hard Copy about this call from Alan Funt, they immediately told me, "Don't take this job!"    According to them, Alan was known to be a pretty grouchy guy who yelled a lot and usually either fired or had his editors quit within a day or two.   But I wasn't about to turn down a chance to work with this legend, and learn how to do Candid Camera right.   After all, I'd been through Ralph at the ashram!  

I worked with Alan for the next month and a half, on a show called Funny Money, and was told that I was the first editor to make it through a whole show with him in years.   He did yell a lot, but fortunately not at me.   We had a special connection the first time I walked into his living room, where he was viewing pieces for the new show.   He motioned for me to sit next to him, and said, "Watch this."

On came a long piece about a dog who was being fitted for a fur coat as supposedly instructed by the last will and testament of its owner. Then a jeweler was called in to measure the dog for a jeweled necklace. The bits had a couple of funny moments, but were way too long and boring as they'd been edited.   After the piece ended, Alan turned to me and said, "Ya didn't laugh."  

My reply to his statement set the stage for a very good and respectful working relationship between us.   I said, with my usual innocent honesty, "Well Alan, that's not because I don't have a good sense of humor."   From then on, Alan insisted that I had to approve every piece before it could be considered for inclusion in the show.   Here I was, just a month or two out of the ashram, and I was editing and helping to produce a Candid Camera show with Alan Funt in his house!  

 

  

CLICK HERE to play the Candid Camera television show I edited with Alan Funt

Get realplayer here

A few weeks into the project, Alan told me he was planning a trip to India and asked if I knew of any good places to recommend.   I hadn't told him that I'd lived in an Indian ashram, and had been trying to act as "normal" as possible, but probably had mentioned something about India or yoga. I usually tended to sit cross-legged, which would sometimes "give it away" that I was into something exotic from an eastern culture.  

Our ashram had just put out what I thought was a very professional brochure about its facilities, and so I was happy to bring one to Alan. He flipped through the pages, and said in his gruff voice, "So, you're a religious fanatic."

I couldn't really deny it, I suppose, so I just laughed it off.   This moment showed me what a different world I'd been living in, and also gave me a guidance to not try to bring people I'd meet into the spiritual path I'd been traveling, and to just be myself without trying to sell anything, even a particular point of view.   Alan later called me back to edit future shows, but by then I was working full time at Disney's Prime Nine News.

 

  Winning an Emmy: The power of heartfelt intention

 

Soon after leaving the ashram, I met someone who had won an Emmy Award, and thought, "Wouldn't it be great to win an Emmy award and bring it back to my Guru as a gift and trophy!"   With this thought came a visual image of wrapping the Emmy award in red velvet and bringing it up to her, saying, "This really belongs to you."  

One thing I've learned is the power of a clear, sincere, and heartfelt inner vision to manifest in the outer world.   According to the understanding I'd gained during the decade of monastic life, our individual consciousness is actually a contracted form of the Universal Consciousness.   Not only are our thoughts connected to the "big dream" of the manifested world; our mind is actually a microcosm of the creator of the manifested world - a co-creator if you will.   Of course, being co-creators without realizing that we're co-creators can get us into all kinds of trouble, which it does every time we utter words and think thoughts about what we don't want to have manifest in our lives.  

Perhaps, when the Bible declares that we are made in the image of God, it is referring to something deeper than just the idea that God might have eyes, nose, mouth, and limbs.   Maybe it is referring to the same idea of "as here so above" that is declared and explained by ancient Indian scriptures, such as the illuminating texts from Kashmir Shaivism, including the Pratyabhijnahrdayam, or "Doctrine of Self Recognition," which explains how each individual soul also has the same - though limited - powers to create, sustain, destroy, conceal and reveal as does the great God of all creation, which this philosophy calls Shiva.

From the Pratyabhijnahrdayam:

Sutra 9: 'As a result of its limitation of Shakti (divine energy), reality, which is all consciousness, becomes the mala-covered samsarin (limited human being).

Sutra 10: Even in this condition (of limited self), the individual does the five actions as does the Supreme Creative Force.

Sutra 11:   These five actions are creation, sustenance, dissolution, concealment, and grace.

The idea of these sutras is that we too have limited forms of the same powers that God has - to create and sustain a creation, as well as to dissolve a creation, conceal the true nature of creation, and bestow the grace to reveal the truth of Supreme Oneness within, behind, and around all of creation. All of these actions are said to take place on many levels and in many ways.

 

  CLICK  HERE to listen to the Pratyabhijnahrdayam in Sanskrit and English

 

After having this clear vision and intention to win an Emmy award, I was soon hired as a full-time editor and occasional producer for a Los Angeles news station.   It turns out that there's hardly a better way to win an Emmy award than to work for the news, since each region has an Emmy Award competition.   Since my TV station was in the Los Angeles market, my pieces would be eligible to win a Los Angeles Emmy award.  

During my first year, two of my pieces were nominated for an Emmy award, but I didn't win.   The next year, I had a near record four nominations, and finally won an Emmy for the last of the four.   This happened just a week or so before my Guru's birthday celebration in upstate New York.   I flew to the ashram, walked up to my Guru's chair with my Emmy award bundled in red velvet, just as in the vision from two years earlier. While waiting for about a half-hour in line, I felt myself starting to become shy.

I often found myself unable to speak before my Guru. I think there are probably a few different explanations for this. One is that my mind and heart would become so united when I was in my Guru's presence, that all the waves of thought would calm and settle down into a greater field of awareness. Her form had come to represent a way of relating to the divine, and her spiritual state carried its own powerful and transforming energy, which was sometimes extremely tangible, and sometimes not so tangible.

As I waited in line to give the Emmy award to my Guru, the energy inside and around me was very tangible. I was a bit nervous about having this rehearsed spiel to give, since I wasn't used to rehearsing and following scripts in my life, much less in the presence of my guru.

But this time, I wanted to get it right. I didn't want to get tongue-tied, as I had so many times before. Sometimes I was practically unable to answer even a simple question from her, because my mind would just stop making words and open into this expansiveness of being.  Sometimes I must have really sounded like a do-do with how I'd respond to my Guru's questions, but I’d guess that she was used to having people be in awe when she spoke to them.

My script was "Gurumayi. When I first left the ashram, I had a vision that one day I'd bring you an Emmy award wrapped in red velvet, and would give it to you, saying, 'This really belongs to you.' So I'm here today to say that this really belongs to you."

It was kind of a tongue twister.

Nevertheless, I gave myself a very stern lecture about coming through for myself, and as I stepped before my guru, I was able to say the words, unwrap the red velvet cloth, and hand the award to my Guru just as planned.

She received the offering with a smile, held it for a few moments, and showed it around to the folks gathered there, saying, "Look, Kumuda won an Emmy." Then she handed the statue back to me saying, "You should keep it."

 

 

 

 

Michael Eisner's Sandwich: The relativity of wealth

The news station I worked for was owned by Disney, and at that time, Michael Eisner was the CEO of Disney.  Reports had recently been in the media saying that Mr. Eisner had made something like fifty million dollars just in stock options that year.

One day, Mr. Eisner came to visit our news station. It was the first time he’d come for a visit, and we were in the midst of one disaster or another.  You know, being in Los Angeles is great for a news station – we had fires, floods, earthquakes, riots, and so many other kinds of disasters to cover.

I know that it was during a big news story because the station had ordered in sandwiches for everyone.   Whenever there was a big breaking news story — usually a disaster of one kind or another — the station would order pizza or sandwiches so that we could eat in the studio without having to take time for a full lunch break.   Disasters for us meant free pizza and overtime pay, which are probably not the best subconscious association to create!

On this day, they had ordered a big bag of about 60 sandwiches for everyone working in the newsroom.   I was the only vegetarian working in the studio at the time, so they always made sure to order one vegetarian sandwich for me.   In-between editing news stories, I came down to the newsroom and sat at one of the desks to eat my sandwich, which had been cut in half by the deli (an important detail!).  

While eating half of the sandwich, I saw Michael Eisner enter the newsroom and stand talking with the News Director very close to where I was eating.   Michael saw the bag of sandwiches and exclaimed, "Are those sandwiches?  I haven't eaten anything all day. I’m starving.  Are there any vegetarian ones?"  Apparently, Mr. Eisner was a staunch vegetarian.  

The news director looked over at me, because we both knew that I had the only vegetarian sandwich in the house. I was about halfway through the first half of the sandwich.   Of course, it wasn't expected of me, but I do like to give to those in need and I also thought, "When else am I going to have the chance to have a multi-billionaire beg half a sandwich off of me?"  

I neatly wrapped up the uneaten half of the sandwich and handed it to Mr. Eisner, saying, "Here is half of a vegetarian sandwich."   I don't think he had seen that it was meant to be part of my meal, and so he accepted the offer gratefully.  

One lesson of this story is that even rich people become beggars when they are hungry.   So much for all those billions of dollars!

   

CLICK HERE to watch a video where I share more about this story along with an Emmy nominated video about the Los Angeles riots that I produced and edited around this time

 

 

Helping Charlie Rose find his destiny

After a year or so of working at Disney, I was offered another free-lance job on the side, editing for a new television show that was first called "Personalities," and then "EDJ: Entertainment Digest Journal."   I was used to working many hours a day during the monastic years, and still didn't have a tremendous interest in doing a lot of socializing, so there was time for another side job.   I also enjoyed working on a variety of projects with new and talented people.  

The host of this new show was very talented; he was Charlie Rose, who has proven himself to be a great interviewer. This show wasn't really an interview show — it was more of a tabloid show with only a few bits of interview here and there.  Charlie was the anchor who would introduce various pieces or "packages" on camera, and he also conducted some of the interviews.

One day I was scheduled to work with Charlie to edit an interview he'd just filmed with Bob Hope.   It was a great interview, with about an hour of raw taped footage.   Bob was filled with one-liners, and Charlie was encouraging him with laughter.   We edited a five-minute piece of the interview, which meant cutting out a lot of good stories and moments.   After we finished polishing the video, it was sent in to one of the executives in charge, who wanted the show to be fast moving and tabloidesque. He sent a message back that we would have to cut the piece down to just two and a half minutes.  


Charlie was understandably upset with this edict, and he immediately ran off to talk the executive producer out of it.   After all, Charlie was the celebrity host, so you'd think they'd have placated his wishes for something so minor.   But no, they were firm - cut the hour of great interview down to two and a half minutes.   Charlie seemed to be close to tears as he came back to the editing bay. In that moment, I believe that Charlie was so shocked and upset that his vulnerability opened up to a deeper layer of his soul. Such moments can jumpstart the creative energy to fuel a whole new, hopefully better set of circumstances.   And I got to be there with Charlie while it happened.

 

A philosophical discussion of how these divine shifts can take place:

According to the ancient philosophy called Kashmir Shaivism, this is something that can take place in the midst of intense shock, sadness, upset, joy, or fear - a potential space is created for transcending the level of outer physical world concerns and distractions, cutting through layers of illusion and bringing us into the center, the heart and soul of our being, the Spanda Principle .   This Spanda Principle is described in an ancient Kashmir Shaivism scripture called the Spanda Karikas .  

The Sanskrit word Spanda doesn't really have a counterpart in English.   If I were to dare to give a try at translating this word, it might be that Spanda represents the creative spark and vibration of all creation - not just the creation of our planet, but of the millions and trillions of other worlds, larger, smaller, and in many dimensions of reality that we can never possibly imagine or comprehend with the mind.   The Spanda Karikas describes how all the thoughts that run through our minds actually block us, the experiential Self, from settling into more wondrous, peaceful, and Heavenly spaces of our own being.  

The Kingdom of Heaven is within you.

— Jesus

The path to experiencing this Spanda Principle can involve quieting the mind of so many thoughts, and jumping into the space, called the unmesha, that exists between the time one thought ends and the next begins.   However, when you are in a state of extreme emotion, such as anger, fear, joy, sadness, or shock, the thoughts very naturally disperse or focus on one continuous thought.   The Spanda Karikas explains that such times offer a precious opportunity to stop thinking about whatever is causing the emotion, and to instead take all your awareness energy and to focus it on the Spanda Principle that exists beyond and behind all circumstances, situations, emotions, and thoughts.

 

Verses from the Spanda Karikas:

Wherein neither pain, nor pleasure, nor object nor subject exists, nor wherein does even insentiency exist - that, in the highest sense, is that Spanda principle.

In that state is the spanda principle firmly established to which a person is reduced when he is greatly exasperated or overjoyed, or is impasse reflecting what to do, or is running for life.

In these states of vehement anger, etc. all the other activities of the mind cease by themselves without any effort.   If the yogis who are always on the alert instantly become introverted, they attain their desired object, spanda, instantaneously.   Those who are not yogis remain only stupefied in these states.

 

  CLICK  HERE to listen to the Spanda Karikas in Sanskrit and English

 

So there was Charlie Rose, very upset about having to basically destroy what was a beautifully edited five-minute interview with Bob Hope, and to chop it down to a measly two and a half minutes. He was obviously in great emotional distress about being a part of this schlocky enterprise. I agreed that it was a shame to turn something so good into a few chopped up sound bites just to make room for a much less interesting tabloidesque story.  

One ability I sometimes have is to glimpse possible destinies of what people could be doing that would be a more powerful expression of their own blessings and talents.   I don't know if these impressions are always right, but some of these suggestions have come to very successful fruition. Even though Charlie and I had only recently met, the shock and anger he was feeling about having to compromise his creative excellence so drastically had opened him up, and we started talking on a much more soul-to-soul level, as if we were old, caring friends. I suggested that this show was probably the wrong kind of format for Charlie, that I thought the Bob Hope interview would stand on its own as a full show, and that maybe Charlie would be able to create and sell a simple hour-long interview show along those lines.   "All you'd need to do is talk and film the conversations." Charlie agreed — it seemed to be something he'd considered before.  

Charlie asked if I'd basically sneak back into the studio with him over the weekend so we could edit a demo tape of his full hour-long interview with Bob Hope that he could use to pitch an interview show.   And the rest is history.   This was in the early nineties, and the successful Charlie Rose show continues to play on television many years later.   The tabloid show "Personalities" was soon left on the pile of short-lived shows, and Charlie had found his destiny.   Charlie's story is proof that we never know what grace may be waiting to be unlocked behind our most upsetting challenges, if we're alert enough to catch ourselves, seize the moment, and act from the space of the deep Self that is often hidden beneath the waves of daily life, and that is sometimes made a bit more accessible during our times of intense emotion, as the veil lifts to reveal a possible new destiny. 

As Charlie's Wikipedia entry says:  "In 1990 Rose left CBS to serve as anchor of Personalities, a syndicated program produced by Fox Broadcasting Company, but he got out of his contract after six weeks because of the tabloid-style content of the show. Charlie Rose premiered on PBS station Thirteen/WNET on September 30, 1991 and has been nationally syndicated since January 1993."

 

 

Jo Champa: Different cultures - fast friends

One year after I'd quickly left the ashram after receiving instruction to go from my teacher, I came back for a weeklong visit.   A summertime retreat was being held by one of the visiting swamis, and it seemed a good time to revisit what had been my home for so long.

I was housed in a dormitory-style room with several other women, in bunk beds.   On the second morning, we all woke up early to get ready to go to the morning chanting session - except for one big lump left in one of the beds, completely covered with a blanket.   That lump was Jo Champa.

We've often enjoyed telling the story of this meeting, each from our different perspectives.   Here's a sample of this presentation:

Kumuda:   "Well, I saw that this one woman hadn't been awakened by the alarm clocks, and thought she would feel bad if she woke up late and missed the wonderful and precious Guru Gita morning chant.   So I went over to her and gently touched her shoulder to let her know that she only had about twenty minutes to get ready before the chant started."

Jo:   "I'm finally asleep, and this FANATIC comes and wakes me up!   It's like 4:30 in the morning!   Nobody should be awake at 4:30 in the morning!"

Later during the day, Jo and I chatted and found out that we had a mutual friend in common, a woman who had edited many movies for the famed Italian director Bernardo Bertolucci.   After this contact, Jo seemed more comfortable with me.   It turns out that she was a very popular actress from Italy who had come to the US to strike it big in American movies. After a few days, Jo left to go back to New York, and soon after, I returned to Los Angeles.

Then, several months later, I received a frantic call from Jo.   She was upset and crying.   She'd spent two years trying to get a role on an American movie, and after going to many auditions and meeting many people, nothing had happened, and she was going to give up and go back to Italy.   "Tell me Kumuda, what should I do?"

Now, I've never been interested in telling people what to do, but I also have a compassionate heart and looked deep inside myself to see if any advice was forthcoming.   From this deeper space, I told her that the next morning, she should go to the nearby New York City ashram of our guru's tradition.   They also held a daily recitation of the morning Guru Gita chant that Jo had skipped during our first meeting at the main ashram, and I suggested that she should chant this grace-bestowing chant while asking for blessings for her work.   Again, it was very rare for me to give an instruction like this — one never knows what kind of karmic binds one is creating by taking responsibility for another's journey.

Jo did go to the morning chant the next day, although she said she was grumbling about it the whole way.   She arrived back home from the chant to find a message on her phone machine - it was for a movie audition.   The next thing you knew, Jo was playing the lead actress in Steven Segal's new movie, “Out For Justice.”

The movie studio rented her a beautiful, expensive room at the posh Mondrian Hotel in Los Angeles for the filming.   At the time, I was renting a tiny studio in a big house that had been turned into a triplex.   It was six blocks from the ocean in Santa Monica, and only cost $352 a month to rent - so you can imagine how fancy it wasn't.   Nevertheless, I'd turned the cozy abode into a temple of sorts, with photos of my gurus and various spiritual figures and deities filling the walls, and with a small shrine in one corner.

How amazing it was then, when Jo asked me to let her stay with me in this tiny place instead of in her fancy hotel. This showed what a simple and heart-based person she was, in spite of being a favorite of Italian glamour magazines.   She knew that true soul nourishment came from friendship and a space that was filled with devotion to God.   We rented Jo a cot, and she stayed with me for a couple weeks.   Occasionally we'd visit her fancy room at the Mondrian, such as when she'd have a meeting with a friend or media contact.

One day, we went to the fancy hotel room to meet an accomplished Italian director named Mauro — a small bearded man who was quite exuberant as the three of us hung out together in Jo's hotel room, with he and Jo chatting mostly in Italian, but tossing in the occasional English bit to keep me in the mix.

At the end of our meeting, we walked the director down to the valet, and at that point, he grabbed my shoulders and planted a big kiss right on my lips.   That was a surprise for me!   I'm sure this Italian director had no idea that these lips had not been kissed for more than ten years!

Jo moved to Los Angeles, and we remained close friends for many years. We were a bit of an odd couple, but also shared certain heart-based qualities.  Over the next few years, Jo had small roles in some very good films, including The Little Buddha, Don Juan De Marco, where she played the seductive princess who calls Johnny Depp in after she’d had him make love with 500 harem women.  I got to be on set when that scene was filmed — both Jo and Johnny looked gorgeous, with Johnny Depp all made up with lots of eyeliner and colorful silk clothes, and Jo lying naked under a satin sheet.

In between the filming of movie scenes is usually a lot of downtime as all the technical crew and set designers prepare everything for the next shot.  During this downtime, Jo and I went to say hello to Johnny Depp in his trailer.  He was sitting with some friends at a small table playing cards.  He was shirtless, smoking, and drinking, and still looked pretty damn good.  Jo introduced me, and Johnny said, “Yes, we’ve met before.” 

“No, I don’t think we’ve met before.”

Johnny looked at me with a big warm smile, “Sure we did — I remember you.”  It was like Johnny Depp and I were in a movie scene together and we were about to dissolve into an exotic flashback of our wonderful times together. 

But alas, there wasn’t a chance that we’d met, unless Johnny had snuck off to the ashram for a bit of chanting.  So I finished the matter with, “Well, maybe it was in another lifetime,” and we left it at that as Jo and I went off to get her ready for the next scene.

As Jo’s close friend, I got to learn about her very different kind of life.  Many of my friends and acquaintances during this time were beautiful women, so I actually had many opportunities to see what life was like for someone who could wrap men around their little fingers. In some ways, this quality seemed to open many doors for these women, but I also saw it as a trap.  If a man is attracted to a woman mainly through lust, it is not likely to be a very beautiful relationship in the long run.

One evening, Jo and I went to a party for the cast and crew of the Mighty Morphin’ Power Ranger, for which I was a film editor. We listened to some music and had a couple drinks, and I introduced Jo to some of the folks I worked with, including producer Lonnie.  I used to be able to do a spot on imitation of Lonnie exclaiming, “Eets not een da budget!”  Like many at Saban Productions, Lonnie was from Israel.  I’d heard that he had been a bodyguard for Golda Meir.  He was a nice enough person who was certainly enthusiastic about the show. Lonnie started practically drooling when he met Jo.  He suddenly became much more charming than I’d ever seen or imagined him to be, although the energy was kind of like a dog who wants to rub himself against someone.  I hadn’t experienced these kinds of energy much during my decade of monastic life, so they stood out a bit more for me than perhaps they would for most.

The next day, Lonnie came up to my editing room to ask if he could have Jo’s phone number.  I checked with her to see if it would be okay, and then gave her number to him.  Over the next few days a strange little drama unfolded that showed me how ridiculous this dating/relationship thing could be.

First, Lonnie called Jo and left a message on her answering machine.  Then Jo phoned him back and also left a message. Lonnie waited a few days to call Jo again and left another message. But then Jo didn’t call Lonnie back quickly enough — after all, why would she rush to call him back?  She wasn’t interested in him as potential boyfriend, and was mainly trying to be nice as people in the biz try to do in Hollywood, where a good schmooze can get you your next gig.

A few days after Lonnie left his message on Jo’s answering machine, he stormed into my editing bay angry that she hadn’t returned the call quickly enough, and shouted, “Your friend is a c*nt!” 

This was one example of the kind of experiences that made me not really want to enter the world of romantic relationships and dating.  It’s not something I felt I needed, and if it meant having people act so distorted with one another, complete with tangled cobwebs of neediness and expectations, then it didn’t really sound like something for me. 

Another thing I noticed was that having men take care of her seemed to keep Jo from doing her best.  Her father was a world famous surgeon, and her brother a lawyer.  Jo was also super-intelligent and could have done many wonderful things in the world, but she didn’t really try so hard to develop her other skills besides being very friendly and pleasant to look at.

It also seemed that some of the wealthy studio executives she was with, who had a lot of power in the entertainment industry, didn’t really want to use their power and contacts to help Jo’s acting career.  Maybe they felt that keeping her in need would also keep her needing them.  If Jo became more famous, she’d be more likely to move on to someone bigger and better. One of her boyfriends seemed to instigate big blow up fights with Jo just before she had a major audition.  I learned from this how having a partner can actually keep you from actualizing your potential.   And even though she was very stylish and attractive, Jo would complain about how one of her wealthy boyfriends who was more than thirty years older than Jo had told her that her breasts were too small -- apparently for the Hollywood industry and himself -- and said that he wouldn't consider marrying her unless she got breast implants.  Update: Looks like she got them (I don't mean to make a snarky joke with this link, but it was funny to see the story and photo show up on many blogs right after I wrote and uploaded this part of the chapter).  I found this to be a totally shocking view into the most petty aspects of what should be a loving, soul-to-soul connection between two people, and thought that if this is what relationships were like, I wasn't interested.

During our time together, I was regularly working while Jo was often depending on these wealthy boyfriends to support her needs.  In-between  boyfriends, Jo would occasionally be in need of financial assistance, and I would happily help her out, as I happily helped many people out. 

A couple times, Jo needed to rent a car, so I would rent them for her since she didn’t have funds or the right kind of paperwork or credit card. Unfortunately, one car I rented for Jo got totaled as she drove it to the gym early one morning and smashed into a parked car on the side of the road.  I was called to a house near the accident site, to find Jo acting as if she was completely stoned and practically unaware of where she was. Jo often acted kind of sexy as though she was on drugs, which I think was a façade she would wear when she had made a mistake or was in trouble for something.  She became more lucid as we talked, but then slipped back into her Marilyn Monroe voice when she phoned her father in Italy to let him know what had happened. 

Jo was especially sad when the first thing her father asked was if she had cut her face, because she felt he was insinuating that her face was the most important thing about her, which of course it wasn’t. Jo had her share of issues, but she also had a big, loving heart that was able to see beyond the usual pettiness of Hollywood obsessions while still playing in that field.  It was on this heart and soul level that she and I had connected as dear if intriguing friends. 

Once Jo and I were standing together in the lobby of our guru’s New York ashram, and as the guru walked by, she looked at us, did a double take, and asked with a smile, “You guys are friends?”  So it seemed that even our guru was intrigued by our eclectic friendship.

After Jo totaled the car I'd rented for her, I had to go through months of paperwork, negotiations, expenses, and communications to take care of the matter, due to the fact that she'd had the car for a month, which potentially invalidated the insurance we'd purchased for it.  In the midst of these months, Jo and I were walking to the gym together one morning.  I hadn’t told her much about what was going on, so I gave her an update and shared how I was trying to resolve the situation without having to pay many thousands of dollars from my respectable but limited wages from editing the news.  As I started to share this, Jo got that drugged look again and said with a slur, “Kumuda, I can’t talk about this, it’s stressing me out.” 

From watching Jo, I learned that being taken care of too much during your life can sometimes keep you from developing the ability to deal properly with challenges.  Being friends with Jo was kind of like being friends with a very famous and sexy actress whose needs should always be taken care of by adoring fans and friends.  However, she wasn’t really known in the United States, and so it fell to friends to help care for her needs.  Once I was out with a friend when Jo phoned with an emergency call, asking me to stop what I was doing so I could purchase and bring her some Preparation-H for a bout of hemorrhoids that was keeping her practically bed-bound.  I did stop and purchase and deliver the goods — what are friends for?

After the big Los Angeles earthquake in 1994, I moved into Jo’s small studio guesthouse in Hollywood for a month or two.  During this time, she broke up temporarily from the wealthy Hollywood executive that she was seeing.  At the time, this boyfriend refused to help Jo anymore with her expenses, leaving her high and dry.   Fortunately I was there and able to pay the rent until he got back on board.

This was the closest I'd lived with anyone since the times I'd had to have a roommate in the ashram.   And in this case it was much closer since Jo and I slept in the same large bed, and also hung out together quite a bit.   

Jo is actually much more beautiful and stylish than she looks in this photo.  In fact, this is possibly one of the least glamorous photos taken of Jo, as you can see from some of her recent photos. But I think this photo of us together, my bad hair day notwithstanding, shows another side of Jo -- the very simple hearted girl that often seemed to sparkled behind her eyes. 

Jo was friends with many of the top designers from Italy, and they'd often give her their expensive designs to wear.   One of the funnier moments came when Jo was getting ready for an evening out. She was trying on various combinations of clothes, shoes, and accessories, and very intently asking my opinions on which combination was best.   I finally said, "Jo, look at me. Look at how I dress. Do you really want my fashion opinion?!?"  

Several times, while we lived together, Jo would put on music and dance naked for me — usually while singing loudly or lip-synching with whatever song was playing.  Jo had grown up as a model in Italy, and was very comfortable with being naked, having posed for nude shots with some well-known photographers.  

I heard at one point that some at the ashram thought I might be gay due to my lack of interest in relationships and my tomboy qualities.  I had never really considered this, since I hadn't ever been sexually attracted to a woman.  And if there had been any doubt, Jo's dances assuaged them, since they didn't do a thing for me beyond my being generally amused by watching someone dance with such exuberance.  

Eventually, Jo met the wealthy Hollywood player who she would later marry.   We'd often spend time at his weekend mansion at the top of Bel Air, which was fancier than fancy.   Outside was a large heated pool with statues, and since we were at the top of Bel Air, we could swim naked without being seen by neighbors.  

I wasn't really that shy about having someone seeing my body, especially after years with roommates at the ashram, but still this was a new freedom of expression for me -- to actually spend the afternoon with friends, swimming and lounging naked around a luxurious pool while sipping wine in our fluffy white robes. Then we'd pick vegetables and fruits from the garden, go inside the mansion and play movies, just having a relaxing time doing nothing really.  Relaxing and doing nothing was not something I was used to!

 

CLICK HERE to play a short clip from Fox News where Jo and I were interviewed about the most popular fruit during the Super Bowl. Our humorous banter went on for about 10 minutes, but they only used a short clip. 

 

Ah-nold

Jo Champa had recently gotten to know Italian bodybuilder Franco Columbu, who had been best friends with Arnold Schwarzenegger for many years.  In fact, they starred together in the documentary film, "Pumping Iron".  

Franco was about to produce his first feature film.   Jo told Franco about my editing skills, and, after we met, he ended up hiring me as editor and co-producer of the movie.

During the movie production, I had a chance to meet Arnold quite a few times.   The first time I met Arnold was on the set of Beretta's Island. It was exciting for me to meet a big star one-on-one, but I wasn't too star struck, because my foundation relationship was with God who had created everyone and everything.   You can't really outshine that!

Arnold spoke with me a bit about the editing equipment I was using — this was the first time and AVID nonlinear editing system was being used to edit a full-length feature film.  At one point, Arnold and I were talking face-to-face when I felt this energy move up through my eyes and into him.  I’d never experienced this before, and felt that perhaps my guru’s energy that lived in me had wanted to give him a blessing, because Arnold was quite a special guy.

While I was editing the movie, Franco asked me if it would be possible to put together a little promo that he could take to an international film expo in Europe.   He needed the promo in less than a week, and was really hoping I might be able to get something done by Friday so it could also be shown for the movie's cast and crew wrap party.   Well, if there's one thing I learned during my years of monastic service, it was to get things done quickly by moving into the divine creative flow.  

I quickly wrote a script and talked a studio into letting me record the narration in one of their extra rooms.   I suppose I was feeling a bit shy about recording the narration too loudly, and the result was that my voice came through with a very sexy quality.   In three days, I completed the entire ten-minute promo trailer, and had it ready to show at the movie's wrap party that weekend.  

Arnold also came to the party, and everyone sat down to watch the new trailer.  Everyone congratulated the sexy woman involved with our production, thinking it was her narration that I’d used.  Surprise! 

After the promo ended, Arnold, who was lounging on a recliner chair smoking his cigar, said, "Show it again."   After the second showing, Arnold once again said, "Show it again."   This happened six or seven times, with the ten-minute promo playing over and over for more than an hour.   Then Arnold stood up and proclaimed, "That should have taken three months to do, and she did it in three days."

I had been sending occasional pieces of my Hollywood work to my guru as an offering, and also to share with her how the fruits of my decade of monastic life were manifesting into the world.   She had sometimes sent positive feedback in response, especially for some of the powerful news feature pieces I'd produced. I also sent this promotional trailer to her, even though it was very worldly and somewhat of a violent movie.   A message came back from my guru's secretary, very kindly saying that she hadn't forwarded the video to our guru because it was a little too violent and dark. 

This was an important guidance for my journey.   With contemplation, this message and my feelings in response to it eventually turned into a wish to only offer my services to projects that were pure and positive enough that my guru might want to watch them.   Once again, my devotion to the guru was helping to guide my steps toward the direction of light and goodness.

 

A Massage at Schatzi

About six months after spending Thanksgiving chatting and drinking peppermint schnapps with Arnold Schwarzenegger, I was eating lunch with a casting-associate friend at Schatzi restaurant in Venice, California.   Schatzi was owned by Arnold, and lo and behold, as we were eating while seated toward the back of the restaurant, I saw Arnold appear at the front.   He was signing an autograph for a young fan with his usual kindness and generosity. 

I wondered if I should go up and say hello.   Would he remember me?   While thinking this, I saw Arnold scan the room and look right at me.   Almost like a kid himself, he rushed through the restaurant and right to my table, saying, "It's so good to see you!   How are you doing?"

Arnold then started to massage my shoulders in a very loving way, while telling me in hushed, almost erotic tones about his new movie that was going to be coming out.   "Yah, it is going to be out in a month. It's going to be hot!"

My friend, Mindy, watched this unexpected addition to our lunch, looking a bit surprised.   In fact, the whole restaurant was watching and surely wondering who this woman was who was receiving such loving attention from Arnold.   Personally, I thought it showed the depths of Arnold's consciousness that he would give such an exuberant welcome to a such a simple person.

Mindy finally asked, "Sharon, are you going to introduce me to your friend?"

I chuckled, and said, "Arnold, this is Mindy, Mindy, you know Arnold."   Arnold took his hands off of my shoulders to give Mindy a very friendly greeting and shake her hand.   Then he came right back to massaging my shoulders and chatting.   It was quite a fun time, and the next time we came to that restaurant, the waiter brought us a free bottle of wine.

Mindy and I at the Emmys:

Several months later, Jo Champa and I were running on the treadmills at our local gym, which also happened to be owned by Arnold.   It was Valentines Day, and Jo was telling me about all that she was going to do to celebrate with her boyfriend.  

Now, I'd never had any interest in relationships or Valentines Day, but the environment does tend to change us, and after moving from a monastic life to Hollywood, I got to see how easy it is for the interests of others to become our interests, somewhat by default.

So I started feeling a little sad about being alone on Valentines Day.  Then, I looked in the mirror in front of us, and saw that Arnold had entered the gym.   Once again, he saw us running on the treadmill, and headed straight in our direction.   As I continued to jog, Arnold came over and checked my gluteus maximus muscles, or in other words, he grabbed my butt, commenting on how well I was running.   After he walked away, I remembered feeling left out of Valentines Day, and thought, "Okay God, that worked!"

Years later, during Arnold's governor campaign, when all the accusations about being groped came up, I remembered this and a few other incidents, and — while I understood how some women might not appreciate the "boys club" mentality of Arnold, Franco, and the other body builders — I was also aware that body builders have a very different concept of the physical body than most of us do.   Touching one another is part of the work — like running your hands on a classic car to check the wax job.   But yes, I suppose that technically you could say that I was officially groped that Valentine's Day.

 

 

On to Chapter Thirty-Five

Back to The Table of Contents

 

 

 

                   Prologue

Chapter 1: Awakening

Chapter 2: Never to Return

Chapter 3: I Chose This?

Chapter 4: Through the Years

Chapter 5: Exploring the Unconscious

Chapter 6: Faith-Healer

Chapter 7: Hidden Persuaders

Chapter 8: The Threshold of Life

Chapter 9: When the Student is Ready

Chapter 10: Magical Meeting

Chapter 11: Toward the One

Chapter 12: Who is Shiva?

Chapter 13: Destiny Calls

Chapter 14: Winter Wonderland

Chapter 15: The Happy Pauper

Chapter 16: This Karmic Dance

Chapter 17: Stoking the Inner Fire

Chapter 18: The Fruits of Surrender

Chapter 19: That Gracious Glance

Chapter 20: How Could He Be Gone?

Chapter 21: From Heart to Heart

Chapter 22: Get a Job

Chapter 23: Smash the Idol

Chapter 24: Clothed in Devotion

Chapter 25: Nemesis

Chapter 26: Who Are You Calling Jad?

Chapter 27: A Perfect Mistake

Chapter 28: She Still Thinks She Did It!

Chapter 29: Taming the Beast

Chapter 30: Undo What You Have Done

Chapter 31: The Great Guiding Force

Chapter 32: The Wish Fulfilling Tree

Chapter 33: Where is the Key?

Chapter 34: The Hollywood Chronicles

Chapter 35: A Funny Thing Happened on My Way to Nirvana

Chapter 36: Love, Betrayal, and the Unseen Hand of God

Chapter 37: An Inner Command

Chapter 38: Cardiff by the Sea

Chapter 39: Miracles and Great Beings

Chapter 40: Shiva's Fiery Dance

Chapter 41: A Shifting Path

Chapter 42: Cheering up Nine Swamis

Chapter 43: Death Threat

Chapter 44: Spirituality For Dummies

Chapter 45: Karmic Responsibility

Chapter 46: A Real Angel

Chapter 47: Send in the Clowns

Chapter 48: Dispassion and Death's Door

 

 

 

 

 

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