Secrets of Spiritual Happiness

Secret #20 -- A Personal Sharing about Shifting Priorities


    

 

By Sharon Janis

 

Get up and dance, get up and smile, get up and drink to the days that are gone in the shortest while.

- Simon Fowler

 

Here, I'll narrate a personal story about some fairly recent priority shifts that have taken place in my life.   The first half of the story illustrates how I consciously rearranged my priorities when necessary, using contemplation and spiritual knowledge to help myself flow and grow with outer changes that had taken place.   The second half shows how the hand of grace helped me to remember and realign myself with my deeper priorities, even as that guiding hand came cloaked within some unexpected challenges.  

Hopefully, you'll be able to apply some of these lessons to your life.   You may even find many more lessons in this story than I discuss here, because it - like most intense life stories - has many layers of potential meanings and lessons.   If I were to delve into all the events of the past decade, it would certainly take many more pages than are available here.  You can read many more indepth stories about these and other events in my online autobiography, Never to Return: A Modern Quest for Eternal Truth.  In this chapter, I'll focus mainly on aspects of this story that relate to this one secret of arranging our priorities.

In 1989, I left a decade of monastic life and moved to not-so-monastic Hollywood. For this transition, I had to shift my priorities from austere ones - such as silence, spiritual study, and selfless service - to the kinds of thoughts, actions, and speech that would be conducive to living a successful life in Hollywood.   After all, I wanted to be in harmony with my environment, and Hollywood is what was being presented before me at that time.   I had just spent a decade living in a monastic ashram, where one of the main teachings was to see the play of God in and as everything.   I thought, "Okay, God.   You want me to play Hollywood?   Fine, I'll play Hollywood!"

I was quickly hired as an editor and producer for a number of popular television shows and media companies.   Within the first year or so, I'd edited a Candid Camera episode with Alan Funt, edited the brand new tabloid show, Hard Copy, put together an interview with Charlie Rose and Bob Hope, and was hired as a full-time editor for Disney's "Prime Nine News" show.   Life was certainly looking different from how it looked during my monastic days.  

Within a few years, most of my friends were actors, casting directors, or producers.   Three years after leaving the monastery, I was spending Thanksgiving evening chatting and drinking peppermint schnapps with Arnold Schwarzenegger, as he puffed on his cigar and told me all about how he'd made different scenes for his various movies.   It was actually a little embarrassing, because I hadn't seen any of his movies, having spent so much time in a monastic life!  

I also enjoyed meeting and chatting with other celebrities, although the "equal vision" practice of seeing God in everyone did tend to keep me from getting too star-struck.

In Hollywood mentality, the goal is generally to move up and make bigger projects with bigger paychecks.   One popular t-shirt said "But what I really want to do is direct!"    Instead of being fully focused on where they were, most of my Hollywood friends were always looking for the next step up, either by moving to a better position in their current show, or by moving to another.   This was part of the dance of Hollywood, land of dreams.

I became somewhat swept up by the expectations of that society, as a whole new set of priorities arose in my life.   I tend to be fairly flexible in fitting into any environment - which can be either a blessing or a detriment, depending on the outer circumstances. I did manage to fit fairly well into this new realm of Hollywood mentality, and also got to learn first-hand how easily we can be affected by our environments.   My priorities shifted from wanting to be as spiritual and selfless as possible, to being more focused on outer works and accomplishments.  

Of course, every experience has its blessings, and I believe that this "Hollywood" shift of priorities was also a great blessing.   My experiences in Hollywood gave me a personal confidence and worldly know-how that would allow me to eventually be able to share some of the deep spiritual wisdom that I'd learned in the monastery, in an entertaining and accessible way.   As I told the acquisitions editor who hired me to write Spirituality For Dummies , "I've lived in the depths of monastic life, and in the depths of worldliness - I can chant like a Brahmin, and cuss like a sailor!"

This is another point I'd like to make about arranging priorities.   We don't have to get stuck in any one set of outer priorities and think that we have to stay with them forever.   Sometimes we may have lessons that lead us into different scenarios with different priorities. However, without a conscious understanding of ourselves as the arrangers of our own priorities, we may find ourselves swept away into a life that never quite meets our deeper goals.   We may lose sight of our soul's priorities, which remain constant beneath and throughout any outer shifts that we may experience.

During these years of Hollywood magic and excitement, I began to notice a deep and growing sense that my efforts toward greater achievement in the film and television business were not really moving me toward the areas of greatest soul priority in my life.  

When it is time for us to rearrange our priorities, the clue can often come as a subtle sense of dissatisfaction with what we are doing.   Of course, obstacles and dissatisfactions can arise even when we are on the right path, so it is not as simple as saying that challenges mean that you should be giving up or changing your goals and priorities.  

One way to check whether you are living in accordance with your deeper priorities is to imagine yourself reaching the pinnacle of your present goals, and to contemplate if that accomplishment would bring you a deep sense of satisfaction. How would it feel to reach the best outcome of wherever you are headed?   Would it bring true fulfillment and happiness?  

For me, this contemplation happened during that Thanksgiving evening with Arnold Schwarzenegger.   I thought, "This must be what it is like at the end of the Hollywood journey - hanging out with other super-famous folks and discussing all of your movies, television shows, and other projects."  

Let's say that I moved forward with all my heart and soul and became as creative and successful as someone like Arnold, or Steven Spielberg.   Would that give me a sense of fulfilling my deepest ambitions and goals?   The answer was, no.  

I realized that even if I made it to the so-called top of this profession, I would not feel deeply satisfied from that accomplishment.   Something was missing in my life, and I could feel it knocking on my heart's door.

I had been swept up by the mentality and priorities of this new social system called Hollywood, and that sweep had kept me too busy to stop and reconsider what was most important in my life.   I'm sure this must happen to many people in various fields of life and career.   We get too busy and absorbed in the necessities of each day to stop and contemplate why we're even doing all that we are doing.

By 1994, I was working on several jobs at once, helping to create the two hottest children's shows of the time.   I bounced back and forth from editing and associate producing the television show X-Men , to editing the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers - working however many hours were required to make sure both shows were done well. The work was creative and fun, and the friends I worked with were amusing, although occasionally risqué, and, at times, vulgar.   During this phase, I was definitely treated to an entirely new vocabulary of words and concepts that would not have been conducive to a pure and peaceful monastic life!

As time went on, I began to feel more and more world-weary.   I kept thinking, "I wish I had more time; I just wish I had more time."   My schedule was so busy that I needed some time alone, some time to rest.   I needed some time to contemplate and digest all the blessings I had received and generated during so many years of dedicated spiritual practice, study, and service.   I needed to stop and rearrange my priorities, however, I was just too busy to do so.

I was working up to eighty or even one-hundred hours a week, putting all my precious time into projects that were somewhat fulfilling in a creative sense, but not truly where my heart's desire was leaning.   I'm sure that many have felt what I was feeling -- a certain satisfaction with success, but also a deep inner questioning of whether this was all I was meant to do with my grand gift of life.

Eventually, my wish for more time came, although in a slightly unexpected way.   I became physically ill, and could barely do anything for nearly seven years.   I had to quit both of my jobs, and would just sit and sit and sit.   I had no idea that the challenge would go on for so long, or that my life would become so simplified by the physical limitations, along with the resultant financial limitations.

Around the same time, an even more challenging scenario emerged.   Someone who I'd considered the dearest of friends, and who I'd helped to clarify and achieve her greatest dreams and goals, began to spread untrue rumors about me throughout our spiritual community.   We had recently grown apart, and astonishingly, instead of offering the kindness and care that I would have certainly offered to her, my dear old friend was trying to harm my reputation and spirit during my time of illness and poverty.   What a surprise that was.

As my friend's untrue rumor spread through our worldwide spiritual "village," it quickly ate away at decades of spiritual friendship and community.   Nearly everyone who I had considered as a friend evaporated, like dust.   There I was, after ten amazing years of monastic life and seven exciting years of Hollywood life - too physically ill to work, about to enter years of financial poverty, and completely alone in this world.  

In the midst of all this, came an inner experience that helped me to approach this new shift with a refreshed sense of enthusiasm and gratitude.  

While sitting quietly one day, I remembered my oft-repeated wish for more time.   "If I could only have more time.   I just need to have some time alone."   Ahh, yes.   That had been my ongoing wish during all those years in Hollywood.

"I just need to have some time alone."    I had been longing for a solitude away from the vibrations of thought, greed, ambition, useless speech, empty relationships, and false facades of communication and miscommunications.   And that's just what God had given to me.   See?   We have to be careful about how we word our wishes!   Be specific!

Nevertheless, this realization helped me to see the unfolding events with a dual perspective.   Along with plugging away through the day-to-day challenges, I also realized that I'd been given exactly what I'd asked for.   I now had day after day of precious, peaceful, quiet time for relishing the blissful comfort of being completely alone.  

The recognition of this new set of life circumstances as a gift from God shifted my approach. I wanted to make good use of this gift.   Instead of just wallowing in misery or self-pity, I used this time and these circumstances to reconnect with my deeper spiritual wisdom.   From there, I began, once again, to arrange and rearrange my priorities.  

First, I looked at my physical situation.   With a growing list of troubling and painful ailments, I considered that this failing health might possibly be leading to my time of leaving this world.  

I was feeling more or less at peace with that possibility, when, in the midst of this contemplation, I "heard" an inner command arising from the depths of my soul.   The initial words of this inner guidance were, "First, you have to share what you've learned."  

Along with this directive came a bird's eye view of all the varied experiences I'd had throughout my life, along with a glimpse of my deeper soul goals.   Within this vision, all my different life scenarios and phases - from youth, to college, to a monastic life, to Hollywood, to this time of aloneness and infirmity - seemed to all fit together and make perfect sense.

That moment of seeing it all fit together and make sense was truly a great gift, which uplifted me into a whole new level of spiritual happiness. Right in the midst of those challenging times came this most precious gift - an ability to see my life from above and beyond my personal, individual self.   With this vision, I entered a new level of trust in the perfect orchestration of life.  

I'd also been given a clear directive from within. I now had a new guiding light for arranging my priorities into the next phase.   I was to share what I learned, whenever and however I was guided to do it in each moment. I knew that if I could approach this undertaking with the right attitude and pure motivation, God, the universal Good, would also support and work together with me, protecting, empowering, and guiding my steps.   I didn't feel a sense of burden in fulfilling this command to "share what you've learned."   Instead, I experienced a sense of willingness, faith, and surrender - and with that, came a great flow of spiritual happiness.

While focusing on my deeper priorities to love, serve, and trust God, I also found that the right people, projects and experiences started to naturally arrive in my life at just the right time - including this book, which came about during lunch at a café next to the sacred gardens and hermitage in Encinitas, California, where the Indian sage, Paramahamsa Yogananda, wrote the spiritual classic "Autobiography of a Yogi" many decades ago.

On this day, I had been running some errands, and decided to stop and have lunch at a small outdoor restaurant, called "Swami's Café," which I hadn't been to in years.   While enjoying my meal, I overheard a fellow at the table next to me asking the waitress about Yogananda and the gardens across the street.   She responded that she didn't really know much about them.  

Being the helpful type, I kindly piped in to tell the man what he wanted to know, and we ended up having a friendly and interesting discussion.   It turns out that this fellow was Avery Cardoza, one of the publishers for Cold Spring Press, who was visiting San Diego for two days, and had somehow ended up at Swami's Café.   Soon, I was writing "Secrets of Spiritual Happiness" for their new "Secrets of..." series, and here we are.

This is one example of how arranging and rearranging our priorities can help to bring us into "the flow."    When our priorities are clear, the universe is better able to work with us in bringing them into form.   We're not just walking recklessly through life, tossing out conflicting desires and resolutions with every step.   Clearer priorities tend to bring clearer results.

When we enter that deep spiritual flow, the universe itself supports and guides our steps.   For example, our inner intuition may give a thumb's up or a thumb's down regarding what we are doing in each moment.   By listening to this inner guidance and approaching our lives with strength, wisdom, and surrender, we can assess what is right for us, and what is best left for someone else to do.

Consider how much time you spend on arranging your furniture, your office, your kitchen, garage, finances, and household work. Arranging your priorities deserves even more care and effort than these other tasks!  

Taking time to arrange your priorities is truly a great step towards attaining spiritual happiness.

 

 

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